Columns Lifestyle

Nice to Meet You, I’m (Still) a Slut! Season Finale

I’ll be honest: I don’t really know where to begin. Little did I know, when I wrote that first piece, that I’d become so emotionally invested in a column – or in any of my own writing for that matter. Three terms, three editors, three lockdowns later and I’ve come to a natural conclusion – not necessarily an end, but certainly the closing lines of what has been a pretty thrilling chapter of my life. When I first began Nice to Meet You, I’m a Slut! I had just arrived at the other side of a crazy, fun, sometimes toxic period of my university experience. I’d never felt more vulnerable than when that first piece went up on the then-baby Blue website; I was publicly re-evaluating my relationship with my sexuality and my own misconceptions of what ‘sex positivity’ really means. It was a lot. But I am so glad that I wrote what I did, and that my OG editor, Breeha Mazhar, invited me back to write a whole column off of the back of it.

A lot has changed in the three terms I’ve been writing – not least because the world itself has been crumbling under the chaos brought about by you-know-what. If anything, having weekly opportunities to explore my own thoughts and relationships with sex, body positivity, bisexuality, monogamy and more, has kept me sane throughout this astronomically terrible year in human history. Much as I like to think that my column helps others – even in simply reaching out a hand of relatability, it has probably helped me the most.

Now seems like the appropriate moment to invoke details from my personal life. What has changed? Well – try not to laugh (I get the irony) – I actually have a boyfriend now. We fatefully matched on Tinder and went on our first date, pre-lockdown, before making things official only one month ago.  Revealing this information in my ‘finale’ seems appropriate given that the first official instalment of my column deemed Tinder a ‘waste of precious time’.

 Friends have continuously joked that I ought to change the name of my column to ‘Nice to Meet You, I’m in a Monogamous Relationship‘, but I figured it doesn’t quite have the same ring to it. ALSO, I hasten to add, just like how being in a heterosexual relationship doesn’t make me any less bisexual, being in a monogamous relationship doesn’t make me any less of a slut. I remain staunchly sex positive and in no mood to let any man undermine this. 

Again, I’ll be honest, entering into a “serious relationship” did induce something of an identity crisis; I felt like a fraud, or like a relationship would surely curtail my aspirations to be a sex columnist. This is not the case. It’s been a month and it’s been business as usual – possibly with even more inspiration now that my partner and I are having discussions about monogamy and our intentions to ‘go open’ once it is more (covid)safe to do so.

I now know that ‘being a slut’ does not mean having sex with anyone and everyone all of the time. Let it be known that sluttiness is a state of mind – it’s more than a lifestyle of leather, latex, and lube. You don’t have to be having sex to be sex positive. If the pandemic has forced me to learn anything, it’s that.

Before I officially sign off as the author of Nice to Meet You, I’m a Slut!, I’d like to thank everyone who’s ever read my column, or even got in touch with me about a piece they liked; it made a HUGE difference to my confidence as a writer and has made it all the more difficult to officially part with my column. I’d also like to thank The Oxford Blue for having me; this publication has provided me with an amazing space for me, and many others, to grow as writers – and I love it for that. And, of course, a mega thank you to all my editors Breeha, Vicky, and Tom as well as my fabulous illustrators Fred, Liv, and Em for working alongside me across these three terms. It wouldn’t have been half as fun without all of your hard work, patience, and support!

Of course this isn’t The End; I will continue writing about love, sex, and relationships for The Blue as well as for other publications. And if you would like to continue reading my other work, then you can find it at my regularly updated website itsalicegarnett.co.uk!

I suppose all that’s left to say is: it was nice to meet you, and – don’t worry – I’m still a slut. 

Alice is our resident sex columnist whose interests include pints, pink, and all things love-related. When she's not evangelising Singledom she's busy hyping up her East Midlands home town, demystifying bisexuality, and writing for other publications such as Lithium Magazine and Adolescent Content.